If your ex-in-laws ignore, override or blatantly disrespect the rules you set for your children after you divorced their loved one, you may wonder if you can confront them without causing further problems in your family. If your ex-spouse refuses to step in and reinforce your parental rights, you may contact family mediation services for help. Family mediation services give you a chance to express your concerns and views about your ex-in-laws' behavior without fear, aggression or animosity from them or your spouse. Mediators may also help you protect your ability to parent. Here's what happens when good family relationships turn bad and what you can do to establish your parental rights with interfering in-laws.
When Family Relationships Change From Good to Bad
If you experienced a wonderful relationship with your ex's parents before the divorce, you may expect to be on good terms with them after it finalized. Although a number of people maintain close relationships with their ex-spouse's family, many don't. In some incidences, former in-laws may stop speaking to their loved one's ex because they may blame that person for the divorce.
Other former in-laws try to undermine their ex-son- or daughter-in-law's authority, which is the situation you're in right now. You may establish ground rules, such as limiting sweets or video games for your kids. However, your ex's parents may encourage your children to break the rules every time they visit or pick them up.
When the Grandparents' Interference Affects Your Parenting
Once the grandparents leave, your children may ignore you when you attempt to reinforce your parenting. The kids may think that they simply don't have to obey you because their grandparents allow them to do what they want.
If the situation worsens, you may do several things to end your former in-laws' interference and passive aggressive behavior. For instance, you may limit the ex-in-laws' visitation days with your kids. However, that action may only create problems between you and your ex-spouse.
If the former in-laws refuse to listen to you or discuss the negative impact of their behavior on your relationships with your kids, you may schedule mediation visits to solve the issues.
How Family Mediation Services Help
Family mediation may be your best option for taking a stand against your in-laws' behavior. You may have the chance to find out why your ex-family members do the things they do in the first place. In some cases, the grandparents may think that they'll lose the love of their grandchildren after your divorce. It may be the main reason for the interference and passive aggressive behavior.
Mediation services may address the issue mentioned above by bringing you and your ex-in-laws together in one room. It may give you a chance to alleviate the grandparents' fears without undermining your own feelings.
If the grandparents don't want to respect your wishes, you may have the option of limiting their visitation rights with your kids. The grandparents may only see their grandchildren when your ex-spouse does. In most cases, the ex-in-laws may choose to abide by your rules because they don't want to lose unlimited contact with their grandchildren.
If you have problems with your ex's parents, contact mediation services like Mitchell Mediation Service in your area right away.